So, after a whirling weekend of study and emotional drama today was a kick in the gut. Literally – thanks to my seatbelt.

After uni I went to drive myself home. And I managed to fly. Literally. In the air.

. . .

A girl had backed out without seeing me coming, and the back of her car hit the front of my car. And somehow my car lifted off the ground. And into the air. INTO THE AIR.

Anyone who knows me well will understand the gravity of this situation. I LOATHE falling. Heights I’m okay with. Swift downward motions? Not so much.

Needless to say I’m lucky to only have a seatbelt shaped bruise across my chest, and a scratch on my forehead. The Boys car was not so lucky and has extensive damage to her inside bits, which I’m horribly horribly sad about. She was my independence, and had been so good to me. Not to mention that she was The Boys car. And was also his independence. And her insurance apparently had run out two weeks ago . . .

Ack, right?

I was lucky that the backing-out girl had not lost her head in the clouds, and had taken witnesses numbers and called the police. And had done everything a normal, sane person who hadn’t just been in a flying car would have done.

Still, I was more lucky (as the multiple St John people told me while I was still blabbering on about being OFF THE GROUND) that my head was still attached, and that my insides were still on the inside, and that I hadn’t gone straight through the windshield. Makes me appreciate all the work done on car safety and all the crash test dummys that have been thrown out of their seats.

In short, ladies and gentleman, like the good clown said, “MAKE IT CLICK”.

It’s very odd, yes, to put people in order. But it seems we sort people all the time, by height in class photos, by income in scholarships, by age in bars . . .

Lenka Clayton and James Price from current.com have done quite alot of sorting. These three videos arrange 471 people from around Britain according to Age (A person of every age between 1 and 100), Love (48 couples arranged by length of their relationship) and Home (73 households in descending order of yearly income).

I’ve only embedded the age video (where the drums were indeed a very nice touch! Loved!) But you can find the others here: Love and Income.

The internets is a strange place, full of people who like to share their hate and throw their weight around with ‘ZOMG! DIE N00bs!’ and ‘lol you sux0rs’ etc etc etc. Because thats so WITTY, and everyone WANTS to hear how much you hate them, or their song, or their amateur fan vid. Its IMPORTANT that you put people down, on the internet. That you tell them all about their flaws that are so glaringly obvious and painful. That you call them names. People NEED TO BE DISSED FOR TRYING.

Right?

Its been pointed out several times, but as Jonathan Coulton has so eloquently said:

“Where’s your thing that you made and put online for everyone to see, you chicken-shit cockhole?”

It takes COURAGE to share your little bit of something with a pack of ravenous wolves, not so cool that the effort and time and that *bravery* isn’t even acknowledged. Instead “I hate you”’s prevent amateur’s from evolving and producing better work.

Nice. Go team.

I say that you ‘chicken-shit cockholes’ get off your horse and have a go, or shut the fuck up.

So, still in Port Douglas, and it hasn’t changed much. Its still hot, the air is like sludge. The only change has been that while there is still no one even remotely close to our age bracket, the pool bar guys have started offering up free and fantastic cocktails!

What else can I say? There are quite alot of bugs here, specifically the biting ones. And jellyfish that can be ‘outrageously painful’ when stung. Except that they are tiny, and hang out in multitudes of millions. So no one swims at the beach here, not even as joke. They do however, swim out on the reef, which we did.

It was expensive but quite fun. Three dive spots, lots of coral and shiny fish (lots of mini Nemos swimming around). There was also a giant groper named ‘axel’ and a couple sharks at the last one. It was very touristy, but so much fun (minus the bright blue bare-all lycra suits).

We’ve also been up to Mossman Gorge, which was also gorgeous. We went down and hung out in the rapids for a bit. Was worried about the big sign which said ‘people have DROWNED HERE’. Still, its mostly rainforest, and appropriately rained the whole time we were there. Except the rain was *welcome*. Its much more muggy and hot up there, rain cooled things down a little. We were going to go on a creek tour to see the crocodiles, but I didn’t fancy sitting in the rain, nor being that close to crocodiles. I’ve seen them at the Zoo, and have no desire to see them in their natural habitat where they eat people.

We have been to a bunch of interesting and not interesting restaurants. Rented some fancy scooters for an afternoon with Sibling, and zoomed around town – THAT was fun. We had matching helmets for our shiny red scooters, and met a bunch of typical ‘Aussie Blokes’ who were trying to help out some ‘Kiwi Shelias’ – that cracked us up no end.

Still, we’ve pretty much done the tourist thing. I’m still so ready to be back home . . . ah well. I’m back in a couple days, not long now!

is in a single word – HOT. Also quite humid. Its like breathing soup. Still, its gorgeous and tropical, even with their own rainforest. The Resort is very very swish (5 stars as the bar people were keen to tell us), we have our own private berth out onto the pool/lagoon and everything is very very comfortable.

Unfortunately there is nothing to DO in Port Douglas, other than laze around the resort. Its a very very small beach town, and typically the resorts clientèle is mostly young families and honeymoon couples . . . .

Needless to say that Sibling and I very quickly befriended the pool bar guys (the pool bar is on a island in the middle of the lagoon – you have to swim over), being so far the only people we’ve met who aren’t 20 years older OR younger than us.

Its quite a touristy place – so far we’ve been sucked in by one brochure (for the Cairns Wildlife Safari park. Its mostly a badly designed Zoo, that is very hot and whose animals can either be found at any local Zoo, or looked miserable. The most exciting attraction was their bear, who looked hot and uncomfortable). Tomorrow we shall set out for a day along the Great Barrier Reef. Hopefully this isn’t another brochure suck in.

In truth, I’ll be quite glad to come home. The lack of freedom is stifling, I miss my puppy (who I’ve been told is having a fabulous time without me) and I miss The Boy. And in this ridiculous soup its not easy being cheerful, so instead I shall go buy some icecream (every second store is an icecream store) and hopefully spend some money.

I promise that when I am home I shall never, ever complain about the cold, or the rain again.