This is one of those things I never thought I’d have to do. I’ve never been in a situation where I’ve had car trouble and a) I haven’t had someone strong and masculine in the car, b) I’ve been wearing a short enough skirt so that someone will stop and help me or c) failing the other two, my trusty AA card. I have to say, this is the first time I’ve ever had a flat tyre. And stupidly, I spent the entire drive home trying to figure out what that weird noise is. So, lesson one: if you hear something weird, pull over and get out and check your tyres.

I didn’t do that. I drove pretty much across the city and waited till I got home before I checked my tyres. Yeah, stupid me. I’m one of those people who don’t know anything about cars. Absolutely nothing about cars. You put the key in, and go, is pretty much the extent of my knowledge. Still, I was pretty determined to do this myself (it’s on The List, see!), which was lucky, because I was the only one there to do it anyway. And because I was at home it meant that I could change the tyre in the safety of my driveway, instead of on the road.

So, first things first. Pull out all the shit in your boot. I had a spare space saver, one of those raise-the-car things, and two tools. I pulled everything out, and set up the raise-the-car thing. It took forever, but eventually I got the car off the ground. Yay! I was actually feeling pretty accomplished at this point.

Then pull of the cap thing that covers the bolts (if you have one) and using one of your tools, undo the bolts. This took me for-fucking-ever, because whoever had bolted on the tyre last had muscles like superman (or a handy mechanics tool). I, however, do not have superman-esque muscles or a handy mechanics tool and spent a rather inordinate amount of time jumping up and down on the spanner thing trying to loosen the stupid bolts. It was alot of hard work, and by far was the worst bit about changing the stupid tyre.

Once you’ve got the bolts off, slide off the punctured tyre, and put the new one in place. Super easy, though don’t do what I did and be surprised about the weight of the tyre. I dropped it on my foot and was unimpressed at myself.

Once you’ve got the space saver in place put the bolts back on. I decided that if I wasn’t strong enough to take them off with my arms, then standing and jumping on the tool to tighten the bolts was perfectly acceptable. I had minor fears about the wheel coming off when I drove, so I spent a long long time making sure the bolts were as tight as they could be.

Once the wheel is sweet, undo the raise-the-car thing (that’s totally it’s technical name) and tada! All done! I have to say I was pretty stoked with myself. I’ve never had to change a tyre before, and actually, it was pretty easy.

The next day I went to Firestone, in Albany to get the tyre fixed. Turns out I needed a new one anyway, but the guys were super nice. They let me clamber around the warehouse to get my 365 shot. They showed me the fancy equipment they used to check everything out with (I was bit unimpressed, actually, because what took me 45 minutes to do took them about 10 seconds). They changed my tyre, checked the condition of my other tyres, did some checking under the bonnet and then they gave me a super sweet discount! $79 down from $125! I was pretty stoked with that. They were pretty good guys, seriously. If you’re in Auckland, and you need tyres, then look them up. They’ll take good care of you.

Anyway. Number 33 on The List: Change a flat tyre. Done. Woo, yeah!

Saving, it’s hard. Spending, that happens without a thought. Even if you get a cash injection into your lifestyle (like, say, a pay rise) then you absorb that money and spend more without even noticing. But going the other way? It’s HAAARD.

I’ve gone from fancy $10 Cafe lunches everyday to two minute noddles and leftovers. I’ve gone from that girl who will drive all over the city just because she can, to only driving where she has to to save gas. Social engagements attendence decisions are based on how much its going to cost me to go, and how much to get home again. And then I weigh up how much I want to go, with how much I want to eat the next week. I’m putting away just under half my paycheck every month. And I’m trying to figure out how I can put away more.

But after three months of this crazy, crazy saving, I splurged today. Siblings boyfriend asked for his camera back, so I did some research and I brought myself a Canon 450D. And now it seems like all the scrimping and saving was totally worth it.

It’s a gorgeous gorgeous camera. I went a bit extra and got the fancy 55-250mm lens as well as the standard 18-55mm. I’m so in love! For those of you with DSLR’s, what kind of camera/glass do you shoot with?

We’re coming to the end of summer. And I know this not because the nights are now cool, or that there is dew on my windshield in the morning. It’s not because we’re eating inside more than we are in the garden, or that we can now spend entire days out in the sun without fear of sunburn.

It’s because on my favourite walk with Quinn the grass is no longer a lush green, but a desaturated yellow.

Fall is on its way.

My mother has a huge family. She has six siblings, SIX. Which means that I have a multitude of cousins, and second cousins. Because there are so many of us, sadly, years can go by before we catch up and see each other. The last gathering was a few weeks ago, and oh! I got to meet so many of my little second cousins, it was brilliant.

I met Riley, who is the only blonde and blue eye’d Maori that I know. He’s gorgeous, and independent and he’s got such a brilliant personality for a two year old Little Man who knows how to High Five! I also met Alyssa and Jordan. Two crazy high energy kids who I love to bits. I taught Alyssa to throw the peace sign and poke out her tongue whenever she saw a camera. It was super cute, and hilarious.

I talked with my cousins, who I haven’t seen in forever. They’re all doing such amazing things with themselves. Starting families, playing in national sport tournaments, rocking high powered jobs or attending cool sounding courses at uni. It was brilliant to see them, and chill out for a while.

It was even more brilliant to sit around the old family table in the house my grandad used to live in. It was brilliant to remember times of when he lived, still. Hearing the same old stories, but told from a different perspective. It was brilliant to play cards, just like old times. To hear my Mum and Uncle bicker and laugh at the end of each Euka round. It was brilliant to see my baby cousins grown, ready to gossip and laugh and be camera whores with me. It was brilliant to meet the new members of our clan, to see and hear them do and say the things that Sibling and I did when we were small.

Most of all, it was brilliant to feel like I was part of something as huge and rambling as our family. To know that with these people is where I belong. Where I’m loved. That I can, at any time, go to any one of them and ask for help and support and I’ll have it. To know that I’ll love and support them, when they need it. There is just so much love. I honestly couldn’t imagine a world without them.

Liz, my bestest friend, was home a few weeks ago. Because I get to spend so little time with her (bit hard when you’re not often in the same country) I took two days off work and had a four day weekend. It was pretty amazing.

We did ALOT of stuff, but mostly I was struck by how much I MISSED her. How brilliant it was to have her around, to talk face to face rather than screen to screen. I’d forgotten how well we get on, how she totally understands where I’m coming from, and how she has never once judged me, or anything I’ve done. She will listen to me talk about this boy, and that boy, and when I expressed my fear about being a ho, she hugged me, and laughed, and said that never fear, I’d never be a ho in her eyes.

She and her husband are amazing. Two people I have all the time in the world for. It was four days of fun, of eating good food and buying cheese at The French Markets, hanging out in the sun poolside, sunbathing in the garden, driving around and making friendship bracelets and visiting her dads new office. We tried on silly dresses, and hilarous one piece swim suits. We exchanged books, and we talked, and drank and it was amazing.

I won’t see her again soon. Not for a few months at least. But hopefully, hopefully, next year we’ll be living in the same city again. I’ll crash on her couch and we’ll drink sparkling wine and eat lots of cheese and gossip and hang out and it will be amazing.

Until then, I miss her already.

My best friends husband learnt how to KiteSurf over the summer. And even though he was in a different country, with an ocean between us, he somehow managed to instil an interest in me. It could have been the few youtube videos he suggested I watch (which turned into me watching a few hundred). Or the enthusiasm he had when talking about, or that he said it was like wakeboarding, but better because there was no boat. Or, it could have been when he suggested that it could be transitioned from water to snow.SNOW.

And oh! Oh, how much DO I WANT TO TRY IT! And I would have, already. I honestly would have, if I could have afforded to. But I’m saving, so I can adventure overseas. I’m putting a ridiculous amount of money away a month, and honestly, I was close to splurging this months allocation on a few lessons and a kit. I almost did, and it was a difficult decision to hold back and remind myself that London was the endgame.

And then he came over, and brought his kite with him. We spent a weekend anxiously checking metservice, waiting for the wind to rise enough to have a go. And then hurrah! On a Tuesday afternoon, it finally did! We drove down to the beach, and I helped the boys set up their kites, and get out in the water.

Sadly, we decided that the wind was too swift for me to try the big kites with the harness. There was also the small possibility of me taking out some of the punters with the big kite, and I was quite keen to NOT kill someone. So I didn’t get a go with the big kite, but I did play around with the practice kite for a bit. I swam and sunbathed and cheered the boys on as they did their thing.

Me, playing around with the practice kite

The boys on the water

It was a brilliant afternoon, and it did nothing but make me want to get out there on a board, with a kite. It’s even at number two on The List. And I’ll do it, I will. Probably in Europe, or something. On a beach in Greece, or Spain. Fingers crossed, anyway

What have you found to be newly excited about?

It was different, on this side. Dressed down, instead of up. Sneakers, not heels. Drinking Redbull, no vodka. Simple black singlet, comfortable jeans. No short skirts or hot little dresses tonight. Before the night kicked off, I was anxious about getting in the others way. Worried that it would be harder than it looked. Worried that things might not go as smoothly as I would have liked. I reminded myself that I was doing this for love, and even if I cocked things up royally, my intentions were good.

I shouldn’t have worried, really. Once the night got started I fell into an easy rhythm. It was hot, with the six of us together. The camaraderie was tight. The jokes a little bit filthy. The winks and grins all alluding to other dirty things. We worked quickly, intimately. Hands on hips as we slid by each other. Working over, under and around. Passing cups under taps, shovelling ice into bostons, dancing around the tills. In and out of the fridges, the chiller, the store room.

And oh the attention! I was unprepared for the attention, and the way people clamoured for mine. I got more smiles, more compliments, more witty one liners, more ‘can I have your number?’s than if I’d been playing on the other side. And it was safe to flirt from over here. Easy to make small talk with the punters, the owners, the band.

I got better at working the taps. I remembered to only shovel the ice with the bostons, and I quickly adopted Asa’s technique to open the bottles. I learnt how to pour wine on the bar with one hand. It was hard work, but fun. The press of people would come in waves, and it was amazing to see them relax, drop social stigmas, and smile more. As the night wore on, we’d take ten seconds for us, ten seconds for shots, ten seconds to keep us going. Sometimes sweet concoctions. Sometimes Jager poured straight from the bottle into open mouths. Over and under, they called it.

By the time lights came up, and night was coming to close I felt like I’d been operating on some kind of high that had come down an hour or two before. I sat on the end of Asa’s desk and watched him count the take for the night. I listened to the boys clean up the bar, and I felt bad that I wasn’t doing more. That I was incapable of being anything more than a lump. I knew the boys night was just getting started. That there would be many more drinks to be had in the closed bar. A private party to celebrate a night gone well.

Alas, I’m not a nocturnal creature. And I left, before the party got underway. I drove up my driveway, sure that morning wasn’t too far away. I basked in the praise, that for my first night I did well. That I wasn’t useless and could pour drinks under pressure. They asked if I’d like to make it a regular thing. Of course I would, really. It was a given, I’d do anything to support the bar. But after tonight, I’d do it even if I wasn’t obligated. I’d do it to be part of that party, to be part of the camaraderie with those people. To work side by side, quickly, with a few laughs, a few dirty jokes, many good times.

They said they’d let me know about the next big function, but we all knew I’d be in next week. I can’t wait.